Go into any major "variety" store and you'll find an entire section devoted to babyproofing your home. Fridge locks, toilet locks, cabinet locks, drawer locks, doorknob covers, door chime alarms, outlet covers, or you can go one step further and completely replace ALL of your outlets with fancy slide-them-over-to-the-side-to-plug-crap-in ones...yikes. The babyproofing industry is a money maker, that is for sure. But they didn't make a killing from me. I will admit to doing the bare minimum when it came to babyproofing. We do have outlet covers and that's about it. I looked at all of the screws that came in the package of cabinet locks and it just looked far too complicated so I moved potentially hazardous chemicals elsewhere. I don't keep anything poisonous in my fridge so I saw no reason for a fridge lock (although it might keep ME out of there...not an altogether bad idea) My kids have never been big fans of the toilet during toddlerhood (meaning they crapped in the tub) so toilet locks weren't needed. We did try drawer locks in our apartment when our oldest was a baby but we got rid of them for two reasons: #1: they pissed us off, those suckers can be hard to open (aka: parentproof) and #2: anyone who knows us and our kids knows that we don't produce the tallest children in the world so by the time she could reach the drawers she didn't care what was in them anyway making the locks unnecessary. Does this make me a bad mom? I'm not sure...it's not like I go out of my way to make dangerous things accessible to my kids, but we also haven't wrapped our kids in bubble wrap and then put them in a bubble for good measure. I don't keep my Ginsu knife collection in the baby's closet, although the hedge trimmer would fit in my son's toybox it doesn't seem like the best spot, and the paint thinner in our oldest's room may start to produce unpleasant fumes after a while.
There are companies out there who will come to your home to babyproof for you. You can PAY someone to do this for you. Really???? Shit, I'll do it right now...for FREE...get the Windex away from the Cheerios, move the kitchen shears away from the sippy cups, don't keep the baby formula and the Comet on the same shelf, it's best to keep power tools on a high shelf in the garage, knives and other sharp objects out of reach is always a good idea...etc, etc. There are BOOKS and VIDEOS that you can buy. Seriously??? WOW...just WOW. Maybe I'm just lazy, maybe I'm just cheap, but I guess some of those things in the books and videos are common sense to me. For those of you about to embark on the parenting journey for the first time, I implore you to save your money...here are some tips on parenting and baby safety from the Daily Epidural for you:
7 comments:
my kid is like a Sasquatch. In fact, at 1 year old people asked if she was 2, at now almost 2 years old, people think she's 3. Apparently my husband and I make GIANT children. We have some drawer ones and some cabinet ones and as she gets taller, things have moved from the foyer table to the top of the television LOL. MOST of the time i'm paying enough attention to what she's doing (as long as its not wine wednesday...oh wait...) and we have enough baby gates to keep her contained in rooms that are kinda baby proofed.
and while we are on the subject of baby proofing....i want you to know that since everything today is non-toxic you know crayons, bubbles, play-doh the list goes on forever...let it be known that i must have used all the toxic ones when i raised my kids and lo and behold they are alive and raising their own families...wow maybe i wasn't so bad after all in the parenting field.....go ahead kids have one of those crayon and playdoh sandwiches and wash it down with a cup of bubbles!!!! have a great day!!
Those diagrams were not only hilarious, but very helpful! Thanks! ;)
Those pictures are hilarious!
I didn't realize they made toilet locks. My LO has decided it's fun to wash her hands in the toilet. I may need to invest. But I can't even get DH to put the seat down, so it would probably be pointless.
I had a fridge lock.. i will admit it.. but i truly got tired of coming into the kitchen and finding Reese covered in chocolate syrup and ketchup.. nything the little stinker could reach and open... it was actually quite fun to watch my hubby try and open the fridge after i installed it!
My mother didn't childproof and I guess I'm o.k. ;)
The only things we used were the outlet covers and the doorknob covers. However, my husband couldn't figure out the doorknob covers (he's friggin' engineer too) and proceeded to rip them off and throw them across the house. They pissed him off. Oh and the other thing was the baby gate for the stairs. However, I didn't go to extremes like moving things, locking things, etc. and my kids are all healthy and normal...well as normal as they can be for being my offspring......
My husband's cousin has a 10 year old. She still childproofs stuff and cuts his meat into tiny pieces even a 1 year old would bitch about. The kid is afraid of his own shadow....
I did EXACTLY as you--some outlet covers, that's all--and lo and behold, my children are still alive to tell the tale! Granted they had to hear the word "No!" a lot from me, but I figured they'd better get used to it. ;)
This whole entry brings to mind the time my friend was ROYALLY pissed that I had not babyproofed MY house before she brought HER into-everything-not-disciplined-EVER-brat-toddler into it for my(then 11-year old)son's b-day/family BBQ. She went into MY bathroom, opened the cabinet under the sink, brought out whatever the offending cleaning product was, and proceeded to berate me in MY kitchen, in front of MY guests, as to what an irresponsible person I was to have that where her Precious Little Angel MIGHT get into it. Hmmm....maybe it's YOUR job to follow Precious Little Angel around MY house, and tell him "No!" on occasion?? I'm just saying....
Leave a Comment