HMADD - A startling disorder
Posted in on 8:14 AM by Anne and Carrie
It is confirmed (not by a licensed medical official). I have HMADD. I am not a genius, but I do frequent medical websites. And even though it is not listed as a disorder, I know I have it. I suffer from Home-Makers Attention Deficit Disorder. It is an ugly disease and I am thinking about starting a support group, but I can't focus long enough to actually do it. I have had it for awhile. I think it is genetic. My mom has it. My sisters have it. Not sure if it is contagious, but some of my neighbors have it too. It is like Herpes. I don't think you can get rid of it. I have tried. Take this for example; I brought something into my bedroom to put away. Our office is a room off of our bedroom. The computer looked at me, I looked at it. Before I know it, I have pissed away an hour checking emails...all because I came to put something away in the near vicinity. But it's not just that the computer is a distraction from a less desirable task. It is that I cannot focus. I have the attention span of a fruit fly on pure fructose. I go to put away laundry, and I end up trying on the shorts I was thinking about wearing when it hits 80 degrees. The button pops off, so the next thing I know, we are driving to WalMart to buy a needle and thread. While at WalMart, I see that potting soil is on sale. So I buy some dirt, pansies and a trowel. When I get home, I start to pot my new flowers. I spilled some dirt in my husband's precious sanctuary (aka garage) so I go into the house to get some paper towels and the dust vac. Then I notice that the charger to the dust vac is missing. I instantly suspect the 7 year old. So I go to his bedroom where I find his drawers spilling open their contents (my huge pet peeve). So I start reorganizing his drawers just enough so I can shut them. Some of the clothes in the room are dirty, so I head to the laundry room...where I'm struck with a lightning rod of brain activity "Ahh yes....this is where I began about three hours prior." But now I have started and left a minimum of 4 projects. I have been moving and working all day, but now the laundry is still undone, I have a pair of unwearable shorts, a new spool of thread, 12 plants, three pots, dirt on the garage floor, a dead dust vac and a half-organized child's room. Shoot me now. I feel like I am on the house cleaning tread mill...and neither I nor the house look any better. My home-making life sounds like the book "If you Give a Pig a Pancake". That author wrote a whole series about cute animals with ADD, and she made millions off of it. Millions! Filthy, lucky bitch. She basically took my life, made me into a pancake loving pig and now she's living the good life. Well, I am not enamored with my inability to hold onto a task for more than three seconds (but pancakes do sound pretty damn good right now....I wonder if I have syrup?) DAMN IT! I can already tell you, I will head down to the kitchen to make breakfast, but on my way, I will see that elusive sock to the unmatched pair that I have been looking for. The other one has been sitting on top of my washing machine waiting for its match. So I will take the sock to the laundry room where I see the still unfolded pile of clothes. So I will start folding the clothes. Then the kids will wake up and need to get dressed. But they won't want any of the clothes that I just folded so we will find other clothes (in their half-organized drawers) and by then it will be too late to make pancakes. So we will have to have cold cereal. But I still want pancakes. And guess what? I am out of syrup. So we will have to go to the grocery store where I will be enticed with the sales ad about the salmon for sale, so I will mentally plan and buy all of the items for a great grilled salmon dinner. And when I get home, I will realize I forgot the damn syrup!!
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6 comments:
LMAO, I was diagnosed with ADHD when I was 23...and that sounds like my brain for sure.
Oh sooooo true! Oh man! So great to see I'm not the only woman that suffers from this disorder!! LOL!!
Thank you for this diagnosis. Now that I know I've got HMADD, do they make a drug for it? Oh, wait...
ROFL!!!! This is so me! I, too have HMADD!!!
we totally need a support group!! I have it too!!!! ;)
OK that is so me. Although I bet you haven't gone as far as only writing half of the address on an envelope before mailing the card because you got distracted :D
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